Author Topic: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.  (Read 71437 times)

Offline Heavy G

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #30 on: July 08, 2010, 04:45:05 PM »
Cool Blue:

I'm sorry to hear this.

I suggest you do the things mentioned above (document everything, especially the statement about seeing the kids) and take the financial precautions.

Try to have a witness around around when you're with her.  If she makes up a restraining order story (and it doesn't sound like she's in that frame of mind) you might lose your right to possess a firearm. 

This sounds harsh, but treat her like an adversary in the biggest business matter of your life.  Because it is. 

I have several friends who are totally decent guys--they tried and tried like you are and now don't have their kids, their money, or their guns (listed in order of importance).

Wishing you the best and I sent a prayer my friend.

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #31 on: July 08, 2010, 04:55:15 PM »
Try to have a witness around around when you're with her.  If she makes up a restraining order story (and it doesn't sound like she's in that frame of mind) you might lose your right to possess a firearm. 
My ex went the restraining order route in retaliation for taking all my stuff out of the house while she was at work.  Fortunately the judge saw the light that I was the one who initiated the divorce, I was the one who moved out to get away from her, and she was the one who purchased a new shotgun after our paperwork was filed.  It was dismissed, but I was fighting to save my career at that point.  I still hate the fact that it remains a permanent public record.  We've reconciled since then, but that's still my biggest resentment I harbor from the divorce; even more than the money I lost in the settlement and money wasted on the attorneys.

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #32 on: July 08, 2010, 06:02:05 PM »
Sounds like you're getting good solid advice here. I'll just throw in one bit of personal advice from experience with DH's divorce before we met. His ex was really a psycho nut job. His daughter was 8 when they separated and he wanted desperately to protect her from the woman.  He felt compelled to try to make her understand what an untrustworthy and evil human being her mother was. He tried to make her see that falling for her mother's act would cause her lots of emotional pain. . But an 8 year old can't handle that. Instead of insulating her from her mom, his behavior forced her to defend her mom and cling to her.  She's 39 now and has seen the light for herself years ago but she still believes that her Dad "couldn't put aside his resentments to put her first".  It's so easy to see the error of his thinking, but it's also an easy trap to fall into. Never ever speak badly about your wife to your children for any reason. They cannot assimilate things like deception or badness.  If there is anything they need to know about her, they'll see it in their own time. It sounds like you're not the sort of person to take potshots at her, but things can heat up and the temptation could arise. Just be forewarned.

Offline Sister Wolf

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #33 on: July 08, 2010, 06:57:40 PM »
QUIT IGNORING THE MEN HERE!

Damn it, Blue, you're driving on the wrong side of the road and you have 15 people telling you to get the hell over on the right side, and you're like, "I'll think about it".

You. Are. Going. To. Lose. EVERYTHING.

I'm heartbroken for you.  What you're going through is so awful.  But seriously, you've got SUCH good advice on this page.  I'd love to see the injured party (usually the husband) WIN for once.

Offline OKGranny

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #34 on: July 08, 2010, 07:46:41 PM »
Thank You Sister Wolf. I said it in my original post, the men have stated it better and all I get from Blue is "I don't want to believe it" which to a point I understand but Blue, even if all of us are wrong, which I seriously doubt, CYA is always, always the smart thing to do. Getting prepared in case we are right and you are wrong is just like prepping for any disaster you hope won't happen, isn't it?

Offline Cool Blue

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #35 on: July 08, 2010, 08:21:35 PM »
Sorry guys, I'm not ignoring you all.  I wound up taking my daughter to the movies tonight.

Things are in motion but I don't want to discuss the details here if you know what I mean.

Thanks again.

Offline BatonRouge Bill

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #36 on: July 08, 2010, 08:33:48 PM »
enough said  ;)

Offline MTUCache

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #37 on: July 08, 2010, 08:37:22 PM »
Things are in motion but I don't want to discuss the details here if you know what I mean.
Glad to hear you're taking care of what you need to take care of.

Best of luck to you. I hope everything ends up happily-ever-after, or as close to it as you decide you want it. ;)

Offline Mr. Bill

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #38 on: July 08, 2010, 09:23:40 PM »
I don't want to sound contrary, because there's a lot of good prepping advice in this thread.  But please -- there's only so far you can go with advice from people who don't know you, don't know your wife, and are hundreds or thousands of miles away.

The most important thing (yes, this is advice from someone thousands of miles away who doesn't know you): Decide what you want.  Do you want to save the marriage?  There are some preps you can make in case it fails, but there are some preps that clearly tell her that you've decided it's over.  Think that through before you act.

Her father died very recently and I think that may be playing a role in it.

This is significant.  Do you understand how this has affected her?  Is she having a mid-life crisis, along the lines of "Life is too short, I should be getting what I want"?

Offline Dainty

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #39 on: July 08, 2010, 10:15:35 PM »
You mentioned seeking out a Christian group....I recommend watching the movie Fireproof and perhaps checking out the book written with it afterwards. If nothing else, it's inspirational. :) It might give you some insight onto how to encourage those "butterflies" in her heart again, and it's a movie the whole family can watch and enjoy if you so wish. :)


Offline PistolWhipped

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #40 on: July 08, 2010, 11:03:06 PM »
I guess it might just be me, but when I read your post, my first thought was "To Hell with that lying, cheating whore." (Well, my exact though was a little more colorful, but to that effect.) You deserve better than that.

Do what others have said.  At this point, she is an adversary.  Work on covering your ass if she decides to make this thing nasty, and start building up your own plan of attack.  I understand if you still love her.  She's the mother of your children, I'd expect nothing less.   I understand you want it to work.  Again, she's your kids mom, and you'd like to keep a whole family, if not for you then for them at least.  But if she's decided that she wants a divorce, she's been thinking about it and talking herself into it for a LONG time.  And she's been researching and preparing before you had any idea something as wrong.  Now YOU need to act if you don't want to get screwed out of your kids, your home, and your money.

Offline Dylboz

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #41 on: July 09, 2010, 12:34:48 AM »
I have been in this exact same situation, though my ex was a lot less "nice" about it. When confronted with the proof she was cheating (she got a new cell phone, and the old one she left in the drawer was full of explicit texts with an ex-boyfriend, another dude she met at a bar, and gossip about all of it and comments about how I was oblivious. After the big blow up, she up and left in the morning). IT. WAS. OVER.

And, frankly, it's over for you,too. Seriously, cut your losses. Grieve, but don't grovel. You will survive, and recover. If you're as lucky as me, you'll find a relationship that constantly makes you grateful and happy, and also makes you wonder what you were thinking all those years. Right now, your geusstimate of an "8 out of 10" lacks the necessary context. Once you date around, and find a woman who truly loves you for who you are, and whom you love back just as much, that 8 will drop to .08 with the benefit of 20/20 hindsight.

In the meantime, don't set yourself up for more hurt or potential financial RUIN. You have a whole marriage worth of property (and maybe debt... see below) to divide up and settle, and you have to protect yourself and your future, you MUST look out for your best interests. Times have gotten tough, so you need to figure out how to hang on to that better life! Listen, as I hinted above, I found out during the settlement negotiations that my ex had run up $30K in credit card debt living her "other life" behind my back. I work in the newspaper business, and we stay late getting the paper ready for early morning delivery, noon-10pm most days, while my ex worked in a college lab from 8am-4pm. She had a lot of time to screw around on me, and she did so with abandon for AT LEAST the last year of our 4 year marriage. She also ran our finances, with which I foolishly trusted her, and that's how she hid all that reckless spending, though she demanded more and more and more of my paychecks to pay the bills all the time. She was even paying her student loans with my money, despite earning about 20% MORE than me, meanwhile I was deferring mine because I could not afford to pay them with what she left me with each month! I was fortunately clearheaded (and desperate) enough by negotiation time to drive a very hard bargain, keep my crappy old cars and my house (minus most of the furniture she took), and agree to only pay a third of that debt, despite the laws in Arizona making it half mine. Nonetheless, we have now been divorced longer that we were married, but I am STILL paying that off, from a WAGE GARNISHMENT!

Point being, you have A LOT of legal issues to worry about RIGHT NOW. This is the time to look after yourself, and not get stuck in the past worrying about what might have been or where you went wrong. This is your own personal TEOTWAWKI. Chances are, you are going to keep finding out more and more stuff you wish you didn't know about her. Your opinion of your wife will continue to change -for the worse- and you really don't want to give her the advantage here. She's been planning this quite a while, she has the element of surprise in her favor, and your feelings are just another weapon in her arsenall. Don't concede the strategic advantage due to your emotional bewilderment. Don't do anything rash! You can deal with your emotions later... HONESTLY, now is not the time. Right now, you two are adversaries, and the sooner you come to grips with that reality, the better.

And cheer up. The best years of your life are ahead of you, not behind you! I PROMISE!;) (even though I'm just an internet stranger, I've been right where you are).

Offline Cool Blue

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #42 on: July 09, 2010, 04:15:36 AM »

This is significant.  Do you understand how this has affected her?  Is she having a mid-life crisis, along the lines of "Life is too short, I should be getting what I want"?


I think that along with the fact that we have two small children and her having difficulty dealing with the fact that she's now in her 30s is a part of it.

Offline MTUCache

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #43 on: July 09, 2010, 07:28:38 AM »
I think that along with the fact that we have two small children and her having difficulty dealing with the fact that she's now in her 30s is a part of it.
Unfortunately, while that may explain her behavior, it doesn't justify or excuse it.

Everyday there's women out there who wake up to find themselves another day older with responsibilities, children, husbands, and family problems. Everyday they worry about becoming less like the carefree and sexy woman they want to be. And everyday 99% of them treat the people in their lives with respect and do the things that need to be done.

I might be able to understand your desire for forgiveness and reconciliation if this was a one-time, spur-of-the-moment bad decision. This was pre-meditated, planned-out, covered-up, and downright deceitful. She knew what she was doing was disrespectful to you, would tear apart your family, and would break your heart. She thought about those things at some point and still decided to do this.

I get people have emotional and psychological problems... I just don't understand why they're able to use that as an excuse when there's hundreds of thousands of other people out there with the same problems who deal with them and don't ruin peoples' lives.

Offline liftsboxes

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #44 on: July 09, 2010, 07:37:03 AM »
Lots of good advice here one thing to add now.

Keep every receipt for things you do with or for your children.  Everything.  Use them during child support negotiations.  Better to have a smaller set amount that you must pay and the ability to do things on a discretionary basis.

Offline chris

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #45 on: July 09, 2010, 10:42:06 PM »
Get a lawyer and go for the jugular. Divorce is like war, cease fires are the enemies way of pacifying you while they regroup.

Offline Pathfinder

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #46 on: July 10, 2010, 06:41:02 AM »
Mr. Bill is right we don't know you or the specifics. But he is wrong in doing what you want to do. Your wife is showing every sign of stalling, diverting attention, mis-directing, etc. on her way out. She has been found out, and does not know how to deal with the discovery, she has lost her control over the situation.

Listen son, she will move on. Even if you go through counseling (I spent damn near 4 years in marriage counseling trying to make it work) her attitude right now guarantees failure. Do not expect an hourly counselor to fix that.

Protect yourself and your girls, secure your stuff and finances, and get a lawyer - yesterday! Go through the process if you feel you must, but do so from a position of strength. BTW - tell her nothing of what you are doing.

And leave the kids out of it. Love them, protect them, tell them nothing will ever change your love for them.

Apropos of nothing - my marriage counseling consisted mainly of me sitting silently while the counselor spent the whole hour talking with my ex - about my ex's problems. Do not be surprised if the same things happen to you - if you go that route.

Offline Who...me?

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #47 on: July 10, 2010, 09:12:59 AM »
CB,

I really feel for you man.  I was in the same position you are now and know how bad it sucks and the swing of feelings that run through your head.  I remember the arguments I had with myself as one side of my brain was feeling the anger and betrayal of the situation, while the other kept reminding me of the love I had for her and the wonderful relationship we enjoyed...right up to the point where I  found out she was a lying, cheating, untrustworthy so and so. 

I know how hard it is to change gears (especially as this is such a shock) from your daily life to the end of a period of your life.  And make no mistake.  Your life has been forever altered.  No matter what the end result is, divorce or reconciliation, things will never be the same.  For good or bad that is just the reality of the situation.

Remember that she has betrayed your trust and no matter what your intentions you just can't give that trust back. She has to earn it, if she even can, and that is a hard road to walk.  For a long time...maybe for the rest of your lives there will be doubt in the back (and sometimes in the front) of your mind when she tells you something.  That nagging voice that questions the truth of her statements and intentions.

But for the moment...it is up to you to defend yourself and your children.  Your kids you say?  Why would you need to defend them from their mother?  She would never harm them as she loves them so much...right?  But she already has put herself in front of their well being and needs.  NO...I am not saying she would ever physically harm them...but their mental state and need of a stable base has been shaken by the selfish act of their mother.  Oh...but we will not tell them what happened and everything will, in their eyes, be the same as always.  Don't sell you kids short.  Kids are ways smarter and more perceptive than we generally give them credit for.  We have a habit of, on one hand, telling anyone who will listen how smart they are while at the same time assuming that they are just kids and don't "get" adult themes.  Ya right.

So...re-read the advice previously given and take it to heart.  Don't forget for a moment that at this point in time you are in a battle for the survival of yourself and your family.  No matter what the end result is, at this moment you, must (at least in your head) be ruthless and selfish thinking only of you and your kids.  Don't believe a thing your wife says and WATCH YOUR BACK. 

Lawyer up.  Doesn't necessarily mean that you need to initiate anything...just talk to one and get his advice on protecting yourself.

Like I said...things may change and you may work things out and all will be well with the world.  And I hope it does as it sure would make life easier and more livable. 

But remember that at the moment she has selfish-itis and while infected is thinking of her best interests...you need to do the same.

Best of luck.   Go hug your kids.   ;)

Offline Dylboz

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #48 on: July 10, 2010, 12:56:43 PM »
Get a lawyer and go for the jugular. Divorce is like war, cease fires are the enemies way of pacifying you while they regroup.

THIS. AND...

Mr. Bill is right we don't know you or the specifics. But he is wrong in doing what you want to do. Your wife is showing every sign of stalling, diverting attention, mis-directing, etc. on her way out. She has been found out, and does not know how to deal with the discovery, she has lost her control over the situation.


THIS.


My ex was more upset she got caught, and her timeline and plans were derailed. I had the goods, and she knew that she was suddenly at a disadvantage. It was a hairy two weeks at first, but when I started asking for reconciliation, counseling, etc., I totally gave away the advantage I'd had, and wound up getting screwed in a lot of ways.

Don't do that.

Offline The Wilderness

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #49 on: July 10, 2010, 01:26:24 PM »
Cool Blue,

There is a lot of great advice here for you. Make your plan and do not waver from it. It is the wishy washy actions that will harm you and your children.
Decide what you are going to do and stick to it.

Also remember this, she is getting the same kind of advice that you are getting here. She is seeking and getting advice from somewhere, a lot of it is going to be the same as you are getting. Make that a part of your strategy. Don't tip your hand but keep it in mind. She is documenting everything also. Trust me she is.

Whether it seems like it now or not, you are in a battle. Your objective is to protect yourself and your children now and in the future.

Be smart and you will prevail, get emotional and weak, and you will loose everything. I have been there and done that. Twice.

TW

Offline Klonus

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #50 on: July 12, 2010, 11:54:07 AM »
I was in a situation very similar and I can tell you that you will be better off and much happier when it is all done.  Life does go on despite the tragedies that fall upon ourselves. Good luck and I hope for a positive resolution in your favor.

Offline Ann

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #51 on: July 13, 2010, 10:31:00 AM »
I will admit that I have NOT read every single entry of this thread.  That being said, I will add this from the "conniving female point of view" (I am a child of a very VERY messy divorce)...

Get yourself a small, inexpensive MP3 player that has voice record, and record EVERY SINGLE CONVERSATION YOU HAVE WITH HER REGARDING THIS SITUATION.  Laws in many states require that only ONE person be aware that a conversation is being recorded. 

I watched my parents (BOTH of them) try to tear each other to pieces, figuratively speaking.  I know this is not your wish, but you must put your mind in SURVIVAL mode.

The advice you are being given here is solid.  She betrayed you.  She lied.  I would not trust her as far as I could toss a tank.

Just my 2 cents.

Offline evilphish

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #52 on: July 13, 2010, 11:51:55 AM »
I don't know if I'm adding much to this thread, but my 2. cents

always always always understand in the back of your head this.

"Family Court is the single most sexist system in the united states.  Men getting a fair shake in family courts is rare."

(that may be a little over the top, but it will help keep you on your toes.)

I don't remember whosaid this but its true.  Divorice turns a marriage into a business transaction.  Like any other business dealing you document everything.  Verbal agreements mean Squat.

She cheated on you and activly researched how to hide it.  You can no longer trust anything she has to say.

and anything you say and do is open to review by a judge.

I'm praying for you, I hope everything works out.  But don't let hope blind you.

Offline Dylboz

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #53 on: July 13, 2010, 12:02:31 PM »
I will admit that I have NOT read every single entry of this thread.  That being said, I will add this from the "conniving female point of view" (I am a child of a very VERY messy divorce)...

Get yourself a small, inexpensive MP3 player that has voice record, and record EVERY SINGLE CONVERSATION YOU HAVE WITH HER REGARDING THIS SITUATION.  Laws in many states require that only ONE person be aware that a conversation is being recorded.  

I watched my parents (BOTH of them) try to tear each other to pieces, figuratively speaking.  I know this is not your wish, but you must put your mind in SURVIVAL mode.

The advice you are being given here is solid.  She betrayed you.  She lied.  I would not trust her as far as I could toss a tank.

Just my 2 cents.

Me too. And in a few instances, literally. That was, actually, why I was initially too nice in my own divorce. I did not want to "fail" like my own parents, or get nasty and bitter as I had seen them become. Now, I understand why, and what they were going through and that it is simply impossible to have an amicable divorce where infidelity is in play. Family court is the LAST place you want to be. It is the VERY LAST place your children want to be. IF you do wind up there, you MUST be prepared, and recognize that no matter what, having a Y chromosome puts you at a distinct disadvantage.
« Last Edit: July 13, 2010, 12:07:27 PM by Dylboz »

Offline LadyRebekah67

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #54 on: July 15, 2010, 05:35:05 PM »
This from a newbie and totally complete stranger.  Having witnessed much and from a female point of view, I pose the following points. (these are generalized, I know)

1.  Women marry hoping he will change (he has potential), men marry hoping she will never change.
2.  Men, in general, can cheat JUST for the sex of it.  There is a mental separation between sex and 'love' that can be tapped into at will.  When women cheat, it's usually 'emotional'. 
3. Love/desire is rooted in how the other person makes you feel about yourself, in general. 
4.  Marriage is, at its' basic core, a contract.  You provide for these of my needs and I'll provide for those of yours.  When ones needs are not being met, then comes disappointment, betrayal, anger and subsequent refusal to meet the others' basic needs, whatever those may be.  (expectations perhaps?)

With those points made, you seem to be intent on saving this marriage.  I urge caution that her intentions may not be as honorable.  Once a woman reaches a certain point, there is often no turning back.  I use a bank analogy.

Your wife (you too) opened a bank account when you met.  Every thought, deed, action, reaction, inaction and feeling is either a deposit or withdrawal of various values depending on the person.  Before you married, you had both made great efforts to build up the balance in your accounts.  Roses = deposit: Late for date = withdrawal: etc..  I ask, what happens to a bank account when the sum total of withdrawals is not offset by equal or greater deposits?  Your account is closed.  And I dare you to go back and try to get them to give you another account with such a track record.  I'm not suggesting that you knowingly overdrew your wifes' account, notice that I attributed thoughts and feelings in this whole thing.  If she had unrealistic expectations to begin with, her own thoughts and feelings (which are innumerable in most women) may have sucked your account dry without you having a clue.  And I'm sure you had no clue because we women fail miserably, when raising young men, in instructing you to understand what makes us tick.  So now that her account balance is so low, she's off to seek deposits from another source.  Perhaps one that makes her 'feel' special, pretty, useful, needed, appreciated, desired, romantically loved, etc...  I must warn, it's difficult for her to turn back, anticipating more of whatever type of withdrawals were coming at her. 

Effective questions for her:  How did he make her feel? Not, why did she cheat.  She probably can't put it into words anyways. What can I do, on a tangible daily basis, to inspire those feelings again?  Delineate your basic needs, each of you, on paper if you have to.  Critically determine if these needs are reasonable or if it's reasonable for you to fulfill them for each other or another source, friends, family, other people or groups...   Also be aware of each of your deal breakers.  These are to NEVER be approached.  (Cheating/lying happens to be a deal breaker to me.)  Always know that neither of you can or should even try to satisfy ALL of the petty needs/desires of the other.  Also, even if you're not 'feeling' particularly loving, ACT as if you are.  Often the simple performance of the act inspires the feelings to come back, on both the giving and receiving side.  Even a simple touch on the shoulder as you pass in the hall is enough to start building that balance back up. 

Ask direct questions and give direct answers.  This one is tough for women because we are more emotionally in tune.  "When you are feeling like this, or acting like that, what would you like me to DO?"  Or "When I am acting like this, I'm feeling like that and I need these things to feel better."  Women instinctively seem to know these things.  Men are action oriented, and men in love would do ANYTHING to make us happy.  The problem is, they often don't know WHAT to do.  They're not very good at interpreting the nonverbal cues that women would scream at each other for not noticing.  Women, if we just TELL them, the simple act of them doing it overshadows their inability to figure it out for themselves.  They are showing their love and attention by their willingness.  "When you come home in a crappy mood, what can I DO?"  "Well, when I'm in a crappy mood I'd really appreciate 15 minutes of down time before the rest of the home chaos."  So tomorrow, arrange for the kids to be otherwise occupied, don't mention the bills that came in and just relax.  The key is to TELL each other what would most satisfy the particular need of the moment.  Much strife can be avoided this way.

Last, if it doesn't end up working out.  Don't bad mouth the other parent within hearing of the children.  EVER. And try as hard as you can to stay in the same town with the kids, whoever they end up with the majority of the time.  Kids learn what they live and we all want our kids to have the best possible foundation for strong, healthy relationships in their futures.  I know this was long, but it might help you save it, if it's possible.

Offline Sister Wolf

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #55 on: July 15, 2010, 05:39:27 PM »
Wow.  That was interesting, and informative, Rebekah.  Thank you.  :)

Offline Heavy G

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #56 on: July 15, 2010, 06:03:14 PM »
Rebekah:

I gave you your first (of many future) karma posts for a great post.


Offline Sister Wolf

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #57 on: July 15, 2010, 06:11:13 PM »
Rebekah:

I gave you your first (of many future) karma posts for a great post.

I am following suit here.  G Love knows where it's at.  +1 Rebekah.

Offline LadyRebekah67

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #58 on: July 15, 2010, 06:18:08 PM »
Awww thanks guys.  I'm feelin the love.  The first deposits in my TSP bank.  Woo Hoo!  Good luck, Cool Blue.  I hope you come out of this okay, one way or another.  ;)  And I, one of many, send you good thoughts and support.

Offline Cool Blue

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Re: Personal Disaster: My Wife Just Left Me.
« Reply #59 on: July 15, 2010, 07:31:11 PM »
Awww thanks guys.  I'm feelin the love.  The first deposits in my TSP bank.  Woo Hoo!  Good luck, Cool Blue.  I hope you come out of this okay, one way or another.  ;)  And I, one of many, send you good thoughts and support.

Thanks.  That was a good post.  I guess I've figured out over the last week what you said, but the way you said it wraps it up nicely.

The update here is that it seems like my wife and I are actually gonna make it.

The crazy thing is, my forgiving her has totally flipped her around.  Now she's more optimistic about our relationship than I am!

Women make no sense some times...   lol!