Author Topic: Husband won't let wife concealed carry  (Read 18007 times)

Offline rikkrack

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Re: Husband won't let wife concealed carry
« Reply #30 on: January 23, 2013, 01:40:05 PM »
Cheryl1

My wife took a free class for ladies only. She learned tons and even taught me a thing or two when she got back. INGO HandK handle gives the class and drives in from out of state. They have at least 2 each year. Probably this spring.

Offline atherts

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Re: Husband won't let wife concealed carry
« Reply #31 on: January 23, 2013, 09:38:04 PM »
Hmm...the businesswoman in me is wondering if there is a market here. Concealed carry parties instead of Tupperware parties?

I've heard of them around Portland. A bunch of people prepay and sign up for the Oregon and Utah class. The instructor comes to the home, puts on the class, everyone brings snacks and you walk out with your certificate that you can use for your concealed carry in both States. I am not sure how many people are needed, but I think it was 10-12.

Maybe combine it with a carry holster sale?

Offline Kayzonara

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Re: Husband won't let wife concealed carry
« Reply #32 on: February 09, 2013, 11:09:18 AM »
Hmm...the businesswoman in me is wondering if there is a market here. Concealed carry parties instead of Tupperware parties?

That would be fun.  Start off with finger foods and and a short presentation, move on to a conceal carry fashion show, then let people try on holsters. 

I'd go. :)

Offline archer

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Re: Husband won't let wife concealed carry
« Reply #33 on: February 09, 2013, 02:10:26 PM »
That would be fun.  Start off with finger foods and and a short presentation, move on to a conceal carry fashion show, then let people try on holsters. 

I'd go. :)
that sounds like a fun 'tupperware' party.

Offline soupbone

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Re: Husband won't let wife concealed carry
« Reply #34 on: February 09, 2013, 04:29:24 PM »
Cheryl,

If your brother-in-law is not just being a jerk, one of the very real concerns that he could have is the end results of a "bad shoot". It is a life changing event that, for a civilian, could end up in prison, loss of house, legal expenses, etc., ad nauseam. Heck, it's a life changing event, even if it is a "good shoot". The sad fact is that most violent confrontations do not meet the level required to justify deadly force. If your sister [or anyone, for that matter] decides to get her CCW Permit, then she needs to get as much good professional training as possible and carry a less-than-lethal alternative, e.g. OC or another stand-off weapon. She will be far more likely and able to use a chemical weapon than a gun. And less likely to stay out of jail. If it doesn't work, she has the lethal backup. The point is it will be HER choice, HER options.

If your brother-in-law is a control freak [and unfortunately, so many cops I've known, worked with and supervised are] your sister is in for a rough ride. What they need, as a couple, is some serious marital counseling. Now, while they are both still young and not set in their ways. If he is not willing to allow her to develop as a person - including CCW, if SHE feels it is necessary - then it would be in her best [and safest] interest to, shall we say, reconsider the relationship. I say safest because I have seen a couple of cases where the controlled wife was turned into a punching bag. Not good. Controlling behaviors are often wide ranging - CCW, finances, who her friends are and how often she sees them, what their social life is like, etc. This relationship needs some serious looking at.

soupbone

Offline liftsboxes

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Re: Husband won't let wife concealed carry
« Reply #35 on: February 09, 2013, 05:06:29 PM »
I'd see if there was a chapter of http://www.2asisters.org/ around for her to visit.

Bonnieblue2A

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Re: Husband won't let wife concealed carry
« Reply #36 on: February 10, 2013, 01:38:07 PM »
Cheryl,

If your brother-in-law is not just being a jerk, one of the very real concerns that he could have is the end results of a "bad shoot". It is a life changing event that, for a civilian, could end up in prison, loss of house, legal expenses, etc., ad nauseam. Heck, it's a life changing event, even if it is a "good shoot". The sad fact is that most violent confrontations do not meet the level required to justify deadly force. If your sister [or anyone, for that matter] decides to get her CCW Permit, then she needs to get as much good professional training as possible and carry a less-than-lethal alternative, e.g. OC or another stand-off weapon. She will be far more likely and able to use a chemical weapon than a gun. And less likely to stay out of jail. If it doesn't work, she has the lethal backup. The point is it will be HER choice, HER options.

If your brother-in-law is a control freak [and unfortunately, so many cops I've known, worked with and supervised are] your sister is in for a rough ride. What they need, as a couple, is some serious marital counseling. Now, while they are both still young and not set in their ways. If he is not willing to allow her to develop as a person - including CCW, if SHE feels it is necessary - then it would be in her best [and safest] interest to, shall we say, reconsider the relationship. I say safest because I have seen a couple of cases where the controlled wife was turned into a punching bag. Not good. Controlling behaviors are often wide ranging - CCW, finances, who her friends are and how often she sees them, what their social life is like, etc. This relationship needs some serious looking at.

soupbone

There are some very good points here about the dynamics of the relationship which only Cheryl can get her sister in law to possibly talk about in confidence. Some additional points might be considered to be presented to the husband who does not want his wife to carry:

1) by his chosen profession his family might be at more risk than other families as someday, someone he has busted might be seeking some payback (see current events and muder victims of Christopher Dorner).

2) He is going to be on duty and not there to protect his family while at work. Wouldn't he rather have her trained to fill that gap until 911 can/does arrive?

3) What is really his problem? Is it one of lack of confidence or trust in his wife? Does he see her as to irresponsible? Or, does he not want to admit to himself that even as a cop he cannot be there to protect her 24/7?

The reality is that most cops are not "gun guys". Some despise yearly qualification requirements and would just as soon not have to carry for their jobs because it is an inconvenient reminder that what they do for a career has real danger attached to it. The prosepect of his wife CCWing might again be a reminder of a dangerous world he'd rather ignore as much as possible.

Offline Perfesser

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Re: Husband won't let wife concealed carry
« Reply #37 on: February 10, 2013, 08:18:17 PM »
Maybe he knows her better and she may be like my wife.
Maybe she's interested in a gun this week as a knee jerk to things she read in the paper recently. Maybe he knows by next week she won't have any inclination to follow through and do the continuous training required.
None of us speculating really know whats going on.

I have my Nomex suit on ladies, go ahead and flame away.

Offline MaineMerrie

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Re: Husband won't let wife concealed carry
« Reply #38 on: March 23, 2013, 01:47:49 PM »
Ok we all agree that the biggest thing is training and more training but I would like to bring up one other thing MENTAL TRAINING.  Being able to pull the trigger when necessary needs to be a decision that is made in your mind way before you have to actually do it. Many years ago when I took a self defense class the instructor told us we needed to decide if we were being attacked with the intent of rape whether we would fight or not. He wanted us to make that decision then and there.  Obviously actual circumstances might alter that decision but if you had not decided in your mind prior that you could shoot someone you will probably not be able to. The SIL should be able to answer this question. By the way I don't know of any state that will issue without some proof of training.

Offline Morning Sunshine

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Re: Husband won't let wife concealed carry
« Reply #39 on: March 23, 2013, 04:36:34 PM »
By the way I don't know of any state that will issue without some proof of training.

Utah does not require physical hands on training for a CCW permit.  Which is why hubby has his permit, and does not carry.

But we have plans to fix that training gap - for both of us - in the very near future.

Offline cheryl1

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Re: Husband won't let wife concealed carry
« Reply #40 on: March 24, 2013, 09:27:32 AM »
By the way I don't know of any state that will issue without some proof of training.

All Indiana requests is your fingerprints and $75.

Bonnieblue2A

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Re: Husband won't let wife concealed carry
« Reply #41 on: April 09, 2013, 11:03:18 AM »
By the way I don't know of any state that will issue without some proof of training.
South Dakota

Offline The Chihuahua has Spoken

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Re: Husband won't let wife concealed carry
« Reply #42 on: April 21, 2013, 09:57:28 AM »
Check out my posting on the "why won't women carry concealed"
http://thesurvivalpodcast.com/forum/index.php?topic=36322.0

How is that situation going, by the way?

Offline cheryl1

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Re: Husband won't let wife concealed carry
« Reply #43 on: April 21, 2013, 08:04:16 PM »
No change. I offered her a spot in the NRA class I hosted, but no dice. She isn't interested enough to buck her husband (and her mom, but that's a whole other story).

Bonnieblue2A

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Re: Husband won't let wife concealed carry
« Reply #44 on: April 29, 2013, 11:51:24 AM »
No change. I offered her a spot in the NRA class I hosted, but no dice. She isn't interested enough to buck her husband (and her mom, but that's a whole other story).
Probably for the best then as if the mindset isn't there first then the responsibility will likely not be taken seriously, IMO. YMMV