I've seen the whole "gray man" thing put a couple of different ways.
One is that you keep your mouth shut, don't advertise your preps, low key, etc. While I agree with this wholeheartedly, this is just Survivalism 101 type stuff, not exactly some new epiphany, sorry to sound rude but it's true.
The other way I've seen this talked about is the concept that somehow you can live amongst thousands of hungry people and not be noticed that you are the only one not losing weight because of stuff like :
1. You don't carry an assault rifle.
2. You cook inside and not talk about your food.
3. You are trying to be low key.
This concept I do NOT agree with in any way, shape or form. While camoflage is a PART of a good defense, if it's your ONLY defense, then your in dire straits IMO.
Your not going to be able to stay in your subdivision and be the only well fed person and not have the neighbors know about it. Sorry to burst some bubbles here, but it just isn't going to happen.
For the "i'll defend my subdivision with my neighbors" types- consider this- How many in your county voted wrong a little while ago? OK I mean voted for socialism. How well do you REALLY know your neighbors? Answer, you don't. You see this all the time when there is a drug bust or someone is busted for something God awful- the neighbors are interviewed and it always goes something like this-
"Old Mr. Smith was such a nice guy, he would lend me his weedeater and give my kids Christmas gifts, I NEVER KNEW he was capable of this!"
Furthermore- how many folks do you think are going to be unpaid mercenaries? Defend "our" subdivision will mean in there minds "defend YOUR FOOD" when they realize you have plenty to eat and they do not.
Simple rule of thumb- if your planning to try to really attempt something like this- PLAN ON FEEDING THEM. And for the "butter knife brigade" folks-
don't arm them if you can't fed them. I know it gives some nice warm and fuzzies to think that your community will "work together" in a large scale long term crisis, the reality of that is much different.
If you found a county where NO ONE received ANY form of gubmint handouts, then it MIGHT work. If you find that place let me know, I'll move there too

Lowdown3